Posts Tagged ‘Douglas Clegg’

This Thursday, October 25th, at 8 pm EST, celebrate Halloween with us. We’ll be joined by our dear friend, New York Times bestselling horror author, Douglas Clegg, whose books have been published worldwide and translated into various editions. His short fiction has won the Bram Stoker Award, the International Horror Guild Award and the Shocker Award, and has been included in several Years’ Best anthologies. His novel, Bad Karma, was adapted into a film in 2002, starring Patsy Kensit and Patrick Muldoon.

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Listen in at: https://tinyurl.com/ycrjd3b6

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Join the Thorne & Cross newsletter for updates, book deals, specials, exclusives, and upcoming guests on Thorne & Cross: Haunted Nights LIVE! by visiting Tamara and Alistair at their websites: alistaircross.com and tamarathorne.com

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Thanksgiving is a time of fellowship, feasting, gluttony, football and drunkenness. There’s a Rockwellian image we put over the holiday that has the same brainwashing effect that the chemical that makes women forget how horrible childbirth is has and, year after year, we do it again, forever trying to make it perfect.

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We know that many people honestly do enjoy this particular holiday; indeed, it is hard to resist because harvest festivals are ingrained in our ancestral memories. Unfortunately, not everyone enjoys the traditional Thanksgiving customs. Indeed, for many of us introverted creative types, it isn’t pleasant at all.

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Last night on Haunted Nights LIVE!, our guest, New York Times bestselling writer, Douglas Clegg, joined in on our Top 13 List.  Since Thanksgiving is around the corner, we decided to think of thirteen ways we could have more fun while stuck at a big family feast.

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  1. Have a Binge and purge contest.
  2. Put ex-lax in the gravy (as long as you’re at someone else’s house).
  3. LSD in the apple cider.
  4. Instead of football, watch porn! Everybody! Kids, too! And Grandma!
  5. Get more imaginative with your stuffing. We suggest these ingredients: 1. Candy corn, vodka, lettuce and spaghetti noodles.
  6. (From Douglas Clegg) – Serve Turducken Surprise.  Turducken is duck inside a turkey, which is great, but take it a few steps further. Put a quail inside the duck, and inside the quail, a mouse, and inside the mouse, a roach, and inside the roach, a tapeworm. To make it perfect, find someone you don’t like and put them on the outside of the turkey.

7. Put Wild Turkey in the turkey. While it’s still alive. Then offer it to Uncle Festus. You know what he’ll do with it.

8.Start a fight. (It’s likely to happen anyway; you might as well take control). Though we don’t condone physical confrontations most of the time, on Thanksgiving, it’s a must. Slapping someone in the neck with slice of ham ought to get things moving.

9. Add just a few grains of rice to the cranberry sauce and mention that the dog has tapeworms.

10. Announce you’re pregnant and one of the guests is the father. Then simply put your face in your hands and break down. As a side note, you do not necessarily have to be female to pull this off

11. Just as dinner is about to be served, announce that you’ve gone green this year and all the food tonight is recycled.

12. Leave festive little Thanksgiving towels spread on each chair and as the guests are about to be seated at the table, announce that your theme this year is “A Natural Thanksgiving” and start stripping.

13. After everyones’ coats have been left on the bed, start scratching and say you’re pretty sure you have a bedbug infestation

14. Finally, if you’ve tried everything else, and Thanksgiving still sucks, tell the guests you just got your period and it’s a doozy and you need to be excused for the rest of the day. Again, gender is not an issue here.

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And there you have it. From our dark crypts to yours, we wish you a festive feast and happy shopping afterwards. And speaking of the holidays, we’ll soon be announcing the release of our Christmas installment of The Ghosts of Ravencrest, which takes place in England in the late 1800s. Join the Manning ancestors as they visit the Frost Fair on the Thames and celebrate Christmas at old Ravencrest, making merry even as death and darkness – and ghosts of the past – close in.

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Expect the unexpected this week on Haunted Nights LIVE! when New York Times Best Selling author Douglas Clegg joins us for an hour of craziness.  Tamara and Doug were introduced to each other by their editors back when they were both young and supple, and they stuck together like gum and park benches, boogers and the underside of Grandma’s chair, and well, you name it… Tamara and Doug,  and their mates Robert and Raul, were inseparable when they all lived on the west coast. Never was Christmas so much fun.  Maybe we’ll tell you about it. Maybe we’ll reveal which books they kill each other in, for that matter…

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But let’s let Doug take over. This is from his Facebook post telling his readers about this week’s program:

“My big event this week (other than the big anniversary with my husband, which was Monday), is that I’m a guest with Alistair Cross and Tamara Thorne on their podcast radio show called Thorne & Cross: Haunted Nights LIVE.

It’s this Thursday night at 9 EST. I’m mentioning it now so you can clear space on your calendar. Oh come on, cancel those theater tickets. Turn off the reruns of Scooby-Doo.

Tamara (a noted author in the horror genre) and I have a long history. In fact, we met for the first time the day after I met Raul. She corrupted me when I was a young, innocent thing, leading me down a wicked path. I can’t thank her enough.

Someday, I’ll tell you about the Vegas trip or the goldfish-bowl margaritas/horror movie night/haunted apartment time, or the shop she blackmailed me into going into with her…well, I’ll stop there. Maybe some of this will come out in the show when we’re not talking writing or the dark side of things.”

(Tamara: Vegas! The birth of Dakota O’Keefe of Bad Things! Oh, what a night that was.  And those margaritas… and Dog Soldiers. Woof.  Wait. I blackmailed him? I thought that shop visit was the result of our activities by the duck pond…)

“I hope you’ll tune in. I should be able to provide a direct link to the live show on Thursday evening.”

(Alistair: Here is the link, but it won’t go live until showtime Thursday: 

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/authorsontheairbookstoo/2014/11/21/nyt-bestseller-douglas-clegg-joins-thorne-cross-haunted-nights-live

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“You just turn up the volume, click and listen. A drinking game may be involved. if you don’t drink, we’ll figure out something else you can do. It is a Green show, LGBT supportive, environmentally-sound, has nothing to do with a Kardashian posterior, no trees were killed in making it, it’s a political-rant-free zone, and it’s good for the honeybees.

As a lure to you, I’ll tell either a very creepy story from my days of single youthdom in Hollywood, or else the worst dating experience I ever had, which actually has a horror twist to it. Or the time…”

(Tamara: There’s a creepy story from your Hollywood days you dare tell publicly? I remember all the other ones… And there are so many more. The hillbilly and his hounds up behind Lake Arrowhead?  How about the things you liked to say in hotel elevators? And, speaking of hotels, three words: Swedish bikini team…)

“I’m sure I’ll live to regret this show.”

We’ll do our best, Doug!

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Cue the music… Release the bats… Grab a horror writer… It’s showtime!

Thorne & Cross: Haunted Nights LIVE! will debut on Authors on the Air Global Radio Network on Thursday, November 6th, at 9:00 p.m. Eastern. With two million listeners in 44 countries, we are proud and excited to be a part of this network, and now, you can give us a like on Facebook at our own Haunted Nights LIVE! page.

At Haunted Nights LIVE! we will be talking about all things horror with the biggest names in the business. From fiction writers and paranormal investigators to haunted spots and true ghost stories supplied by our listeners, Haunted Nights LIVE! will feature fact, fiction, and that indiscernible gray area in between.

Our guest list so far includes New York Times Bestselling author Douglas Clegg, International Horror Guild Award winner Glen Hirshberg, children’s author extraordinaire Q.L. Pearce, bestselling Bite Club author Hal Bodner, and paranormal writer and researcher, Sylvia Shults – and that’s just the tip of the blood-covered machete.

So polish your fangs, sharpen your claws, and come take a bite out of the dark side. Thorne & Cross: Haunted Nights LIVE! is coming your way. Listen for the sounds of phantom footfalls…

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